Monday, January 23, 2012

Should I Read my Oncology Report?

Today marks the day, six years ago that I had my breast cancer surgery while I was 29 weeks pregnant with Kiera.  I understand that the walk I have been on throughout my life contributes to who I have become.  However, I am tired of it.  I am grateful for the opportunity to be a survivor, a lot of other men and women do not get the same conclusion to their cancer fight.  I started this blog in hopes of continuing to help others going through the same fight be encouraged and have faith that there certainly can be a wonderful outcome.  But, honestly, I am kinda tired of thinking about cancer.

At work last week a customer and I talked at great length about it.  She had the same exact cancer and diagnosis as I did. I enjoy that. I do.

I was chatting with a group of friends on Facebook about my urge to read the Oncology reports I never could get myself to read all the way through. The last time I tried I got three paragraphs into the first page and read "extremely high chance of disease recurrence" I was in tears for days.  I mentioned to my friends that maybe I should read them through because maybe the doctor changed him mind later on.  A Sweet friend replied. "Maybe GOD changed his mind! You are here with us, you are healthy! Why get all depressed because of what someone said 6 years ago!?!" and another great friend said "Will reading this enrich (my) life in some way? Do (I) feel like there is some need behind reading it? Is there a reason it would be worth."  Another suggested I "make (myself) a cake and celebrate!" another "agree(d). Live life to the fullest."

Don't I have marvelous friends???  I do. I know I do.  No looking back, move onward. Enjoy life to it's fullest. I heard that 90% of what we worry about never happens anyhow! 

ps... I love you ladies!

 <3 Tammy